Meatgrinder Of A Day

I slept passably once I got myself calmed down. I hung around in bed until just afternoon. I almost called to have him not come because it was feeling like his coming over made the situation more real. I held on and didn't call. Still very stressed over managing the estate but it's really just about process. As I told my brother, think what you want about how Mother handled finances but she left us an estate. Nothing monumental but she left us something. Not bad for a women who was born into a public assistance situation at the Great Depression. I miss her presence terribly.

I got him to take me to Wendy's for lunch. I'm a bit bonkers eating alone and couldn't face another can of soup. I had my Dr. Pepper and baked potato, saving the Caesar side-salad and chili for later. I nearly choked up thinking of the times Mother and I had dropped into Wendy's with similar orders, often after a difficult day visiting Father on a hospital visit or something. We're in a good place, not battling over anything in the house. There are a few things I thought he might want that he doesn't. All we need to do is sell the car for enough liquidity to continue servicing debts until the house is sold to clear debts and walk away with our shares. A rubbish bin looks like it'll be $400. My brother and I are realizing that such things are estate costs that we can be reimbursed for whichever of us picks it up (if either) on the near term.

I'm trying to involve him more because the burden is great. He's got a young, aggressive realtor he'd like to pitch the house to and the guy sounds OK. We've basically decided I'll move when financially viable--likely a month off. I'd rent with as short a lease a possible and try to stay in walking distance of the house for some continuity. Unfortunately there really aren't many apartments in reasonable walking distance. I don't care what the place looks like, just so long as I can do the basics and keep the cat. A garage would be great for temp storage. We're agreed I shouldn't try to rush off and buy a place. That would be too many things on my plate.

He's more keen in trying to "milk" the house than I am but I understand his motivations and yes I'll benefit financially too. I don't much care. I don't care where I live since effectively I'll be starting from scratch. I'd like to keep cost-of-living down. A lot of that is about buying smart and living frugally.

Duckie is online! Must chat with him. He had flooding!? The world is against us. :/