Couple More Things...

So the car won't be ready for at least two more weeks. Once it was apart there was more damage than originally estimated. I tried to talk my brother into taking title and then my sister-in-law is trying to talk me into keeping it. My brother seems to be having a harder time processing things than I am. That's just my impression. He tells me the same stories and still expresses being dumbfounded and numb. I can hear it in his voice.

I think I know why mother insisted I leave. I offered to stay with her when my brother decided he needed to go home, take his son to school and get cleaned up. She's always protected me. When I was young and a severe asthmatic, doctors had told her to protect me from stress triggers. She always did. When my father slipped off a building at work and fell four stories, when she came down with breast cancer, when my grandmother was terminal... and even later. I just found out the other day my brother had been down with mono last year. Maybe it had to do with my hospitalization at 2 yrs where I spent time in an oxygen tent. That had to scare her. I'm tough intellectually and have learned a bit about coping. I've learned to talk more. I've learned not to bottle things up so much. I've learned a bit about mitigation and distraction. I'm potentially better off than I've ever been as a person, if not in these circumstances. And make no mistake, these circumstances suck.

I think I can live in the house alone if possible, even if just short term. I'm puzzled why my brother expects this could drag out a year. I would be shocked if it even takes six months to have things settled and plans in place to pay off any outstanding debts of the estate. Perhaps I'm too optimistic or just ignorance is bliss in this case.

I found out some things about credit--don't take this as advice, this was just an observation shared with me. It seems if you have old debts, delinquent debts, you're better off letting them go than going back and paying them off. It seems that will reset the virtual clock and it'll take another 7 yrs for those things to fall off your report. I've been fortunate not to have delinquent debts (knock wood). I also learned it's bad to pay off credit cards, they want you to carry a balance so I'll probably just pay down my one card with a balance and keep something on it just for the credit barons.

We're due for rain tonight perhaps and Monday as well. We had a little rain last night and it's been relatively cold. I don't mind. I've got good blankets, a cat and I survived sub-zero wind-chill temperatures during my uni days. That was some trial by freezer my very first winter and we had an Arctic storm! I learned the truth of bone-chilling cold where the very marrow hurt, where the warmth of my eyes causes my glasses to fog up. Where entering a heated room made you feel on fire as you thawed out. It was cool (both ways) but I don't think I'd want to make a habit out of it. I never did find out who pulled the fire alarm when I was in the shower and had to venture into the snow in a bathrobe and bare feet. Drunken idiot most likely.

OK, no duckie on line right now so I've still not talked to him all(?) week; we'll catch up one of these days. I'm off to bed and hopefully Genuine™ sleep!