Fun!

So the Feds rejected the return for some error that made no sense having to do with date of death. I took that out because their computer was probably confused by the year of death not being the tax year. Today I see they accepted the return. I can't believe the amount due--$1200! I paid on Mother's behalf and now I'm nervous over money because I didn't expect paying that out along with mortgage payments, supplies for house and my own bills. That amount is much higher than last year though her income didn't change much. I think the taxes were screwed up and not just by the "last minute" thing. I'm very seriously considering calling Mother's regular accountant and saying... look at this mess, please! Mother has more than that in a savings account but we don't have access to it. I still think the dead have a better time of it than those left behind!

When Father installed a security door 20 years ago, he built a second threshold for it, making the overall opening smaller. I took some wood down along the top to make more room to move the new french doors inside. I think there's enough space now if we're careful.

Yesterday I called a different place about inheritance advance. That fee was only 50%. I thought the guy was a prick. I should call other places too but I feel ashamed to be in situation to call them. I have always hated borrowing money and even though this is basically borrowing from my future self it requires middle man. Borrowing is admission of failure. I have failed to amass huge amounts of money for unexpected situations. :(

With the tax thing and large policy still an unknown I might have to do that. Duckie convinced me selling car is worse than advance because equivalent car would cost lots more and car will be needed anyway for transportation. At this point I've been walking except when I have Brother here or when I had to call neighbor for a lift from grocery store. Ok, I took bus to court but I'd still be walking if I hadn't! I do still have a free one-way bus pass.

I'm trying to convince myself an advance isn't so bad because fee will more than be "earned" in "fixes" done to house: landscape, carpet, ceiling scraping... It seems we only want "small money" so the option of doing an administrator loan is not worth it. I guess that's like a 2nd mortgage with 30 year term, etc.

Best situation is really to get insurance pay out but Mother meant that for me alone. Maybe advance would still be worth doing since it is really debt of estate authorized by heir. I wish I knew how soon I can begin to be reimbursed by estate on bills I've paid though. Do I have to wait the four months required for soliciting debtors to file against estate? Do I have to file? Lawyer can tell me or it's probably in huge packet I have but I've got headaches and body feels all kinds of stress. Need a big break from stress! Need to relax. Stress is distracting me.

Need to figure exactly what I can afford. I'm nearly finished paying student loan so I hate to go into deferment but it might be needed for "breathing room" and I shouldn't cancel my heath care but I might need to because it's $300 per month. I could drop high speed internet too. The most major thing though is that I'll have to move out sometime and that will cost money for rent (presumed). Right now, obviously, I can't pay mortgage and rent both and if I could that would be stupid waste! Stress is not healthy! I hope for good news soon.

Today's mail was boring. Bank statement, phone bill. I'm feeling very tired. I haven't eaten very much today so that's bound to have contributed but I'm feeling disenchanted with life. I might take a nap early this evening.