Where's My Eject Button?

So I phoned to get a change of beneficiary on my own life insurance so a form is coming for that. Maybe I'll set up a dart board for who pisses me off least. Brother never did call me last night. And he's slept today. Talked to the SIL awhile. More on that in a bit.

Got a call from the large policy insurance company, an agent wants to meet with me on Thursday, here at home. She claims she only wants to make sure the claim form is correct but I'm not buying it. I have no trust here. They're miffed because Mother died within a year of getting the policy. No one had a clue, even the ER doctor didn't have a clue for 6-8 hours into her treatment what the real cause was. Fuck them. They wrote the policy, there was only a suicide exclusion, the other stated terms were met. I don't see why they need to investigate anything else. It doesn't fit in their neat little actuarial tables. Fine.

The lawyer got back to me on that estate bill. She reminded me I don't have to pay regardless of what it claimed. That's the law. Sure, it's the law but it still annoys me. It's stressful.

So talking to the SIL. She's a pushy broad. I felt worse after talking to her. I could hear the ching-ching of dollar signs in her head through the telephone. Mother had her sized up. I heard about how short on money they are, how short they will be when she loses one of the kids she takes care of, how cheap things should be done at the house to prepare for sale, how horrible I was to suggest we might consult another realtor to shop around. She wants me out of this house, no question. It's not to settle the estate. Give me a break. It's not to help me out because when I suggested May might be unrealistic she said "but that's the best time to sell" blah, blah. She offered to paint. I've heard that before. It was 2002. She painted a hallway closet which I then had to come back and paint again. Thanks but no thanks.

She gave me the standard line about well we don't want to leave it all to you to do which of course is just crap. I've heard it before. It's been me doing it all along. This is why I was meant to get the house. I worked for it. In retrospect I'm sorry Mother didn't get her will completed and I could explain her thinking which had more to do with distrusting her daughter in law than having a problem with her son. The SIL has never been wise with money. Not only did she go into bankruptcy herself but pulled Brother into bankruptcy as well. It's taken him a long time to climb out of that hole. She's been unable to maintain a job. She gets bored easily and can't fit in with office politics. She has pursued and tossed away more entrepreneurial ideas that I can recall. Now, just as she was to return to the workforce with the niece starting school she's got a newborn in foster care (pending final adoption). And she's losing one, probably both, of the children she watches all within the next couple of months. She doesn't want to take on more kids. Ok, fine. But there's income to make up. Is it any wonder my brother doesn't want to leave his career and move across the country? It's no wonder she was pressing the issue and wants the house sold. She wants that money. I wonder if I'll get paid back for the rent money I gave them while at uni. Still waiting on that.

Mother used to say my brother could put her in the White House and his wife still wouldn't be satisfied. I get that now.

I didn't like her tone. She complains, she whines, she chatters. And she was insistent that her ideas were superior but she didn't want to say anything because it might cause hurt feelings. Oh, and because she has no part in this, it's up to me and my brother. Of course then she launches into her notions... She's full of shit. Probably gets it from her adoptive mother who seems to be a woman without redeeming merits. She also went on about her stress, trouble with the kids, blah, blah. I'm thinking: "OMG, kill me now!"

So I've been feeling miserable. Feeling too isolated today. I just want a nice quiet life with minimal drama. She's always been a drama queen. If I drop contact with my brother's family it'll be entirely because of the SIL. She loathes me, or is at least uncomfortable with me. Whatever. At different times, in different contexts, Mother and I had each expressed a feeling of being unwelcome regarding the SIL. Vegas noted that my brother seemed unhappy when we stopped in last week. No surprise, I guess. I'd be miserable as hell.