Turning a Corner?

Perhaps I'm turning a corner this week. Either I'm feeling a euphoria from a lack of caloric intake or I'm turning a bit of a corner with my decades long war with myself. I'm not ready to jinx it so you'll have to wait for more detail.

There was no Shawn Pyfrom or Ryan Carnes in Housewives this past week. Wait. That's not entirely true. Shawn appeared in a split second recap of a moment from season 1.

I happened to realize last evening that an overarching reason I haven't visited folks Down Under (nor much anywhere) is trust. Not of outside forces and folks as much as myself. Who, how, what do I behave like? Am I really repressed? Am I satisfied being a relative square? Would I find myself flirting too much with danger? Danger as in a tease? It's a bit like an email I got from another frustrated soul: To Date or Not To Date. Seems to be on many minds these days. What's the point if you know you're not going to settle down with that person? What's the point if you're not self-assured enough not to be wrestling your own moods while working on a relationship foundation? What's the point of dating women or men, men or women if you're not going to have sex with them? I've been hearing laments about the oversexed nature of homosexuals. It makes me sigh with sympathy and comprehension. I know just as many who are self-loathing after brief encounters as those who have gone on the public bath and gym shower circuits. Neither have seemed particularly happy.

There's a lot of discontent in life. Expectations we create for ourselves, about life and living. We don't live up to them. Or sometimes we do and find our imaginations exceeded what reality was able to provide. Pain in the ass, really.

I'm developing a 'thing' (I don't know what kind of thing so don't ask) for accented English. Brits, Scots, Irish, Aussies, Canucks… That about covers it. Wait! I forgot the Kiwis. (Oops! Sorry Drew!) Jus' iz long as it ain't Am'rican ghetto talk, dawg.

There's this character on CSI:NY, Danny Messer, with this NY accent which makes me want to take a potato peeler to my spinal column. I thought it was just a really bad bogus accent but IMDB assures me he's from Staten Island NY. Maybe he's self conscious about it. I'll pause here because Duckie is begging me to give him attention.